Mia's Mind

This is an excerpt from my vampire novel Tabeth that I am currently revising. Sarah is a detective and she is interviewing a woman who’s husband was Tabeth’s latest victim.

“…Sarah handed the woman yet another kleenex, “Let’s go back to the window, where were you and your husband standing when the window broke?” Focusing her on the window instead of what came through it or her husband seemed the least likely to upset her more.

The woman sniffed, took a deep breath and continued, “We were standing right in front of the window. When it hit my husband it ripped his hands off me.” She showed Sarah the nasty scratches on her neck surrounded by growing bruising. The bastard had been in the process of strangling her! “When I looked around after I got up, I could see it, she had him.” Her eyes grew wide again, but it seemed her crying had somehow giving her more strength. “She had fangs, and she was clamped onto Darrel’s neck. It was snarling like an animal, her claws dug into him, holding him as she… she…” the woman stopped, the whites of her eyes showing, but she didn’t cry, she didn’t break down. “Her eyes were like a wolves’, or a lion.” She looked at Sarah then. “You know how lions hold onto the deer’s throat while pinning them down till they suffocate? It reminded me of that. Only she wasn’t suffocating him, and it happened so fast. One moment she had him like that and the next she was screaming in rage, throwing him across the room! She just threw him like she was throwing a bag of trash. Then she screamed again, only this time it was more like a roar type scream, I can’t describe it. But I will NEVER forget it.” The woman had her hands up over her mouth, and looked straight into Sarah’s eyes, “It was a woman, but it wasn’t human. I know that sounds insane, but it wasn’t human! She turned to me then and I was frozen with fear, I nearly passed out from it. She … she… she crouched down like an animal and bared those horrible fangs at me and screamed again, like she was challenging me. I couldn’t stand anymore and dropped to my knees right there. But I couldn’t take my eyes off her. She came at me slow, nearly crawling, but still on her feet. There was blood on her lips, she turned my head, exposing my neck…” the woman was shaking like a leaf, looking off into the distance. “I was so scared I couldn’t move! Then she was gone. It took me a few blinks to realize, she was so fast. But she wasn’t really gone, she was pacing the living room, walking bare footed on the broken glass, muttering to herself. It shocked me some that she was talking. She seemed so animal-like, I hadn’t thought of her thinking. But she was… she was talking to herself saying stuff like: “No no I said no, she didn’t do anything… we got the one we came for… we can get another somewhere else…no… no… I said NO!” It was like she was fighting herself, then she like, went into a frenzy, but she didn’t attack me, she started ripping up the carpet. She seemed… frustrated… but she didn’t even look at me again, she just tore into the carpet for a while, then stood up tall, took a deep breath, and walked out the back door.” She waved in the general direction of the back of the house and looked up at Sarah again. “She attacked him because he was hurting me, and she controlled herself so she wouldn’t kill me too. She’s an animal, but there’s some part of her that’s still human in there officer, I don’t know why, but she saved me.”…”

What do you think? promising? want to read more? or are you yawning? Let me know!

Posted in Tabeth
Tags: novel, Tabeth, vampire, writing

Lore of the Witch World (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I am currently reading, courtesy of my daughter’s mother’s day present, Andre Norton‘s Lore of the Witch World.

I am collecting all of Andre’s Witch World novels, the older the better, and this was one I didn’t have.

Started reading these with Trey of Swords around the 80′s sometime.

If you have never picked up one of these classics I highly recommend them!

Posted in books Ive read
Tags: Andre Norton, books, Lore of the Witch World, reading, Science Fiction and Fantasy Writers of America, Witch World

I just sent this to my mommie, I wrote it today for her.

Memory Poem

My Mommie, as I remember…

                                                Hugs

Kissing the boo boos

                                                hugs

Thank you’s for every dandelion offered

                                                hugs

Patiently allowing my Day Dreams

                                                hugs

All your clean sheets used as tents

                                                hugs

Dealing with dead fish worms in pockets

                                                hugs

Going along with my imaginings

                                                hugs

Searching JCPenny for the new John Denver record

                seeing it below us as we went up the escalator!

                                                hugs

Giving my pet hermit crab (Peek_A_Boo) a funeral

                                                                                                in your rhubarb patch

                when he died on the Last Day of School

                                                                                                (Saddest LDoS EVER!)

                                                hugs

Laying out together in Florida

                both with our heads in books

                                                hugs

Trying to teach a tomboy to sway her hips when she walked

                                                hugs

Letting me talk you into more color

                when you were into ‘neutrals’

                                                hugs

Shopping Used Book stores

                getting yelled at by Dad for bringing home a bag each!

                                                hugs

Hanging out with me at the mall like a big sister

                                                hugs

Snagging your Romance novels when I ran out of Fantasy to read

                                                hugs

Sharing my baby girl’s first laugh

                (Velvet and that big ball!)

                                                hugs

Hearing your story about how she locked you out of your own house and…

                stood there waving at you while you waited for the lock smith!

                                                hugs

Beating Breast Cancer like a REAL heroine!

                                                Group HUG after you got better.

~Maria Rich aka your crazy kid! Mothers Day 2013

Looking forward to my next hug!

Posted in Poetry
Tags: memories, memory, Mother, Mothers Day, Parent, poem, poetry

I actually got some work done on Tabeth yesterday, and even a bit this morning. Gotta keep the momentum going. Any other writers out there get sidetracked and find it hard to keep on track?

Word count hasn’t changed much, but revision is often taking out as much as putting in. Working my way down to the romance section, checking timeline, fixing inconsistencies… I find I like revision, yet it isn’t as enthralling as writing storyline, so I have to work to keep my interest up. Wish I didn’t have to work, want to write! Have tomorrow off though, YEAH!

Posted in Tabeth
Tags: Fiction, Literature, novel, writing

Obviously school and writing don’t seem to work for me, but now that school’s out I am going to get to work! So… lets see where I stand on my novel…

1. Timeline troubles; still needs work, going to try plugging stuff into an excel worksheet I got (see below)
2. Romance upgrade on first meeting scene; adding sensory input to enhance scene.
3. horror = fear = tension and I need to go through the whole story and increase this

That should do for a start.

Posted in Tabeth
Tags: book, Literature, novel, Romance, writing

Flash Fiction generally refers to fiction of around 100 words or so. This is a FLASH that is coherent enough to give the reader a true sense of not only what is going on, but some of the emotion of the moment. For one of my classes we were asked to write a flash NON fiction, a memory from our own, or another child’s, real life. Not only that but we were to put it in the perspective of that child. I found this so fun that I had to share what I wrote!

Mommy and Daddy told us to stand like in Red Rover and not let the dogs in. My older sister Tabby was much bigger than me, I had to yell and kick at the dogs to keep them away, she just had to tell them “NO!” Mommy says the chickens don’t feel it and they sure do taste good! But still I didn’t look. Tabby called me a sissy, but she didn’t look either. Suddenly a chicken ran out between us and the dogs gave chase! We ran after the dogs and mommy and daddy ran after us! It was a Hoopla until the chicken realized it was running around without its head and decided to lay down like a decent dead chicken! We was all breathing hard and laughing, even daddy!

This was my own memory and I was about 4 or 5, which would make this around 1976ish…. wow thats really dating me! LOL Oh well! Hope you like it!

~Mia

Posted in Uncategorized, writing practice
Tags: memories, writing

Well last week was a bust. Our furnace broke and we are running on space heaters. brrrrrrrr Not freezing, but can you say double sweaters and throw blankets? Check that with school

“Whipping Tom”, detail from the Yale Center ‘Panorama’ (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

starting this week and you a got a recipe for a Wet Noodle Whipping!

I’m sure my husband will wana watch hehe.

Sooooo sense I did NOTHING on my book last week, I need to do something meaningful this week despite school starting and all that jazz. We shall see what today brings.

Book I just read last night for my Children’s Lit class that was very sweet and sad and said way more than what was on the surface. Just like good poetry should:

LOVE THAT DOG by Sharon Creech

Cover of Love That Dog

Posted in books Ive read, Uncategorized
Tags: poetry, Sharon Creech

Well I am still working on the chapters running up to the ‘big romantic first contact!’ chapter, and I am finding issues with my timeline. Sigh… logistics are a bother! I find poor Kris wandering in a sewer in search of Tabeth only to I get them together and Tabeth talks about things that haven’t happened yet! (or I haven’t bothered to write yet and there’s no TIME in the current timeline for her to have DONE them!) grrrr And if I make him wander around for another day/night to get those things done I have to figure out how to at least get him some water because two days wandering in a sewer without food might be doable, but humans gotta drink! Forget sentence diagrams, I am now working on detailed timeline diagrams to figure out these issues!

OK, that’s too many exclamation points. Chill girl, take it one step at a time, one conflict at a time, you’ll get it done. Perhaps there are some timeline tips on the WWW somewhere I can use to help out, let me look…

English: Line art drawing of a kris. Français : Dessin d’un kris. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

*Giggles* Zemanta suggested this picture in response to my post LOL Kris!

OK I might have found a tool that will help, but I need to work with it a bit to really tell if this will help more than my notebook messes. Weather it helps or not I like the blog I found it on and will be back over there to read more of her tips. She seems to have the same trouble I do with keeping timelines strait, so we will see how it goes.

Her blog, and the post were you can find her handy Fiction Timeline Worksheet is: Sandra Chmara Writing and Editing

Thanks Sandra I will give it a try!

Posted in Tabeth, writing tips

Well, I have found a couple problems right off the bat with my “Big Idea” project for turning chapter 11 into a Flash Fiction Vamp/Romance part of my novel Tabeth. First of all Flash Fiction is generally 1,000 words and after copying this chapter into a separate file I realized it is already over 2,000 words! wooops….. So its not FF in a technical sense, but I will carry on with the idea in mind.

Second, I did just a brief google search for romance story plots to get the idea of what to shoot for, and found that for the most part they are similar to  your standard story plots. This is what I found:

1. The Setup/Hook

A scene or sequence identifying the exterior and/or interior conflict (i.e., unfulfilled desire), the “what’s wrong with this picture” implied in the protagonist’s (and/or antagonist’s) current status quo. (Mernit, 110)

2. The Meet/Inciting Incident

The inciting incident brings man and woman together and into conflict; an inventive but credible contrivance, often amusing, which in some way sets the tone for the action to come. (111)

3. The Turning Point

Traditionally occurring at the end of Act 1, a new development that raises story stakes and clearly defines the protagonist’s goal; most successful when it sets man and woman at cross-purposes and/or their inner emotions at odds with the goal. (112)

4. The Midpoint/Raising the Stakes

A situation that irrevocably binds the protagonist with the antagonist (often while tweaking sexual tensions) and has further implications for the outcome of the relationship. (113)

5. Swivel: Second Turning Point

Traditionally occurring at the end of Act 2, stakes reach their highest point as the romantic relationship’s importance jeopardizes the protagonist’s chance to succeed at his/her state goal—or vice versa—and his/her goal shifts. (115)

6. The Dark Moment/Crisis

Wherein the consequences of the swivel decision yield disaster; generally, the humaliating scene where private motivations are revealed, and either the relationship and/or the protagonist’s goal is seemingly lost forever. (115)

7. Joyful Defeat/Resolution

A reconciliation that reaffirms the primal importance of the relationship; usually a happy ending that implies marriage or a serious commitment, often at the cost of some personal sacrifice to the protagonist. (116)

I got this list from this blog: http://kayedacus.com/2008/04/28/writing-the-romance-novel-the-seven-story-beats/

Who got it from this book: Writing the Romantic Comedy by Billy Mernit

With this in mind I realized I need to set up this scene better in order to pull it off convincingly. Kris needs to metaphorically “descend” as he physically descends before meeting Tabeth. Also, I have to make it take longer so Tabeth has time to become what he ultimately finds. Soooooo more revision needs to be done on the chapters before this one to make it into the perfect romantic moment.

So… I will start out today by working on Kris; his unfulfilled desire, his goal that will be made into his personal conflict “ it sets man and woman at cross-purposes and/or their inner emotions at odds with the goal“.

And off to begin!

Famous Last Words (My Chemical Romance song) (Photo credit: Wikipedia) Doesnt have anything to do w post other than I love MCR!

Posted in Tabeth, writing tips
Tags: Arts, Flash Fiction, Protagonist, Romance, Tabeth, vampire